Top 5 Ways Watching Porn Ruins Your Sex Life

It’s no secret, pornographic videos are a billion dollar industry. Though I am by no means suggesting that viewing porn is deviant or immoral behavior, I believe it’s fine time that people begin to examine the side effects of regularly watching pornography. Please consider:

The Top 5 Ways Watching Porn Ruins Your Sex Life…

5. Unrealistic Expectations– OK, clearly porn is a part of the film industry…which means it’s all staged. This is an obvious element of these films. Nevertheless, the lack of even a proper introduction and not so much as a dinner date and couples dive straight into (pun unintended) hardcore sex? Slightly unrealistic to say the very least. On the flip side,this does seem to be something that is becoming more and more common place in this day and age; random hook-ups and flings? Could there be some correlation?

4. Improper Technique– The purpose of porn is to entertain and I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that most of these videos are made by and for the male species. That being said, almost nothing about watching porn will show a man how to truly please a woman’s body. They may show you how to make her curse, scream, holler, and claw…but I believe you’ll that such actions do not always equate to pleasure in the real world. If you’re watching porn for bedroom tips, you’re doing it wrong…

3. No Intimacy– The main feature of porn is said to be the ‘wham, bam, thank you ma’am’ approach to sex. That is to say there is very little talking, holding, kissing, or anything that may slightly resemble true love and affection in these videos. This is all well and good, but this is also one of the top complaints when it comes to women being dissatisfied in the bedroom. If you have heard or even made this complaint before perhaps you should take a moment to find out why someone would be so comfortable having full on sex with a person…yet not comfortable looking them in the eyes or holding their hand. Counter-intuitive to say the very least…

2. Instant Gratification– As aforementioned, the premise of most porn videos is to introduce 2 people and get them having sex as quick as possible. To take it a step further, many turn to pornography when they are experiencing sexual frustration. This is not necessarily the worst thing in the world, however, sometimes the reason we are experiencing said frustration is because we need to work on our relationships or ourselves. The usage of porn in these instances usually hurt instead of help the situation.

1. There’s No ‘Unsee’ Button– The things we see stick with us. From what I gather, there are hundreds or even thousands of different genres of pornography. Some are more on the ‘normal’ side while others are far to the left. Either way, mistakenly coming across a disgusting video is something that may stay imprinted in your brain, and thus affect your libido, for the remainder of your life. Indeed, even clicking on various posts on social networks such as Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram can introduce you to a whole new world that you neither knew, nor wanted to know, existed.

The Bottom Line…

Pornography will likely always be a controversial issue. Whether you choose to view it regularly or not, do keep in mind that these scenes are not real and the only way to have a happy sex life is to communicate with your partner.

Venus L

Oldie but Goodies: Top 5 Youtube Workouts for Seniors

Staying in shape is important at every age. Thought many believe they lack the time and/or resources to stay fit, the internet has contributed largely to giving individuals the knowledge and tutorials to get/stay fit in the comfort of their very own homes. No matter how busy or sedentary your lifestyle, rest assured that there is always time for exercise. After combing through pages and pages of free workout videos for seniors, I have compiled a list of the 5 that are the most effective without requiring too much time, equipment, or movement. Welcome to:

The Top 5 Youtube Workouts for Seniors

5. Senior Citizen Forever Young Cardio Aerobics– Time Commitment: 14:46. Equipment Needed: None. Target: Full Body. Join Senior aerobics instructor, Victoria Popoff, as she dances and instructs to some timeless tracks. Yes, sweat to the oldies with this fun and effective workout perfect for anyone seeking for low impact cardio. And who knows, you may even learn a new step or 2…

4. Pilates for Seniors-Great Pilates Workout for Beginners and Seniors (Part 1)– Time Commitment: 10 minutes.  Equipment Needed: Mat or Soft Floor. Target: Full Body/ Strength Training. Looking for a low impact way to tone and strengthen your entire body?! Look no further! Try this short workout and introduction into the wonderful world of Pilates. This is a floor workout but this is also something that could be tried from the comfort of your own couch or bed, safely of course…

3. Actively Aging Energizing Chair Yoga– Time Commitment: 33:09. Equipment Needed: A Stable Chair. Target: Full Body/ Balance/ Stretching/ Flexibility. It’s never too late to learn a new skill! Yoga is arguably one of the best types of workouts for seniors as it is notoriously low impact and utilizes personal strengths while improving weak areas. Grab a chair and join Sherry Zak Morris, E-RYT as she instructs you into a thinner, leaner, stronger body.

2.Fit Over 50- Abdominal Exercises– Time Commitment: 6:34. Equipment Needed: A Mat and 2 dumbbells. Target: Abdominal Muscles. Who says you have to be young to have washboard abs?! This short workout was created on the popular free tutorial site MonkeySee.com, this is the perfect workout for those who are seeking to tone up their midsection. Short but effective, this is not only good for seniors, it’s good for everyone! Grab a mat and a set of small free weights (1-5 pounds to start) and jump on in!

1. Jane Fonda Walking Cardio Workout: Level 1– Time Commitment: 26:45. Equipment Needed: 1 Chair. 1 Towel. This one is simultaneous a blast from the past and glimpse into the future. Watch and sweat along with the lovable actress, Jane Fonda as she shows that hard work pays off at every age. Indeed, with a better figure than many 20-year-olds, Fonda presents a series of low impact moves that are sure to get your blood pumping and your body back in shape!

Overall

Staying fit and healthy is of high importance to everyone, especially seniors. Share this list with any senior who needs a little fitness push or anyone who may have an inactive senior in their lives. Email, text them, or just invite them over and do the workout with them! And as always, make sure you consult a physician before beginning any new workout plan. Happy training!

Venus L

Top 5 Ways ‘Empire’ is Changing Television

Being an avid skeptic, I can admit that it took me a few weeks to tune in to Fox’s latest series, Empire. Starring Terrance Howard and Taraji P. Henson, the show is absolutely reminiscent of the blockbuster smash Hustle & Flow. Whether that intrigues or repels you try giving it a chance before you judge it…you may be presently surprised.    

5. Back to Black– Not to get all racial…but it has been quite a while since we’ve seen a successful…or any series on prime time television, with a majorly black cast. Not only is this show opening and reopening doors for a slew of black and brown actors, it is also making room for more such series to be conceptualized in the very near future. Keep in mind that an array of successful black shows on prime time television is something that we haven’t seen much of since the 90’s…

4. Music Sales– As innovative as it is enjoyable, Empire is doing something unique with its associated music. Not only are they composing and recording original tracks for every episode, they are also releasing the tracks for the fans to stream and download. A controversial move, as the artists are reportedly given zero rights to the music. Nevertheless, the soundtrack adds much to the quality of the show and it has already topped the billboard! There just has to be some Guinness Book world records headed their way.

3. Ratings– In case you’ve somehow missed all of the hoopla, the ratings are through the roof! With views reaching 20 million per week and new fans on boarding to the Lyon bandwagon daily, one can only wonder how much these numbers will climb for season 2. Furthermore, another interesting factoid about their ratings is the fact that much of their views come from ‘on demand’ and streams of the show and many tuned into the series late and took to other avenues in order to catch up.

2. Urban Homophobia– It’s definitely not novel to have an African-American, homosexual character. In fact HBO’s hit series The Wire was the first to successfully integrate an overly masculine, urban criminal into a TV show, via their character Omar. Nevertheless, what makes this show’s commentary on homosexuality so revolutionary is that it boldly displays the intolerance of homosexual males within the black/urban community. One of the main characters, Jamal, has had a difficult journey this season as he has had to grapple with being true to himself or trying to please his bigot of a father, Lucious, whom routinely antagonizes him in the form of snide comments and slurs. (There is even a flashback from his childhood when he got thrown in the garbage for cross-dressing.) It seems that it has opened the dialogue for the community at large as most viewers get together to discuss the subject matters of the show.

1. Psychological Neglect– This season, we also saw quite a bit in relation to mental health issues. The eldest son, Andre, goes through an emotional journey with his unchecked bipolar disorder. Interestingly enough, it seems that the main reason he is not getting the help he deserves is because his father, Lucious, refuses to acknowledge the validity of his issues. Furthermore, even his mother, Cookie Lyon, responded unfavorably to Andre’s commitment to therapy asserting that these issues are ‘some white mess’, or a problem that mostly exists in the white community.  This is a huge issue in the black community as many believe that accepting a diagnosis for a mental health disorder is a weakness. Due to this, the African-American community is said to have the most untreated/ neglected mental issues. The fact that Empire shows how these issues are typically swept under the rug until it explodes, shows great courage and will hopefully lead to dialogue and better resources for mentally ill people within the black community.

Overall…

Empire is not without its flaws. The story-line, at times, is a bit corny and unrealistic (as with all musicals) and it also shares its fair share of stereotypes. Nevertheless, it is a pretty good show that is entertaining and inspiring many people, of all races, across the globe. If you haven’t yet tuned in, not to worry! You can check them out here! No rush though, I hear the next season doesn’t start until January 2016…let’s hope they were joking!

Venus L

Just go for it: Top 5 Reasons to Ignore Your Brain and Follow Your Heart

In an age in which almost everything is being simplified and reduced to robotic-levels of thinking, it can be quite difficult for anyone to stay true to themselves. Indeed, we as humans have a tendency to try to fit in rather than standout. Thus, many learn to silence their own voice in the name of uniformity and group cohesion from very early in life. However, is this the best way to live your life? Usually not.

Presenting

The Top 5 Reasons to Ignore Your Brain and Follow Your Heart: 

5. It’s Your Journey– While this should go without saying, it obviously needs to be said: it’s your life! That’s right, no matter who you love or try to impress no one else will ever be able to live your life for you (body doubles and identity thefters be damned). That being said, we as humans have a tendency to seek out advice from trusted sources when we are experiencing a dilemma. This is obviously a good way to get different perspectives but when it’s all said and done you and you alone will be stuck with the ramifications of said decisions. Furthermore, people tend to give the best advice for them (something you should always keep in mind) so the end results may even be more favorable for them than yourself.

4. Intuition is Real– Whether or not you believe it’s all a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo, there is a lot to be said about the power of intuition. According to a study conducted by Psychology Today  “This part of our brain became highly skilled at sensing immediate danger as well as places of safety.  However, because most of us now live a relatively safe, day-to-day existence, that part of our brain is not triggered very often, and when it is, we are not familiar with it, so we tend to ignore its messages.” That is to say that most of us only tap into this part of the brain when our safety is at risk. This speaks to the fact that intuition is an innate, primal instinct that can be used for a variety of things.

3. Inspire Others– You don’t necessarily go on a campaign of greatness to inspire other people. Many times the most minuscule actions to some is wildly courageous for another. Things such as changing careers or going back to school are great examples of how making a decision to pursuit our interests can rub off on others. Sometimes all it takes is for someone to see you doing something…to realize that they could/should be doing it too.

2. YODO (You Only Die Once)– You read it right: you only die once…you live everyday! Never stifle your goals or future because you’re catering to people who will one day be a thing of the past. If you want to do something (that’s not hurting anyone) do it! Fill your days with the things that you love; everyday can be a new adventure!

1. Dreams Come True– The top reason why you should ignore your brain and follow your heart: dreams come true! Sure, it may be a long shot for you to be the next Jay-Z or Beyonce…but I’m also willing to wager that Hov and Bey were both told they’d never be…Hov and Bey. That is to say, if you are not pursuing your true passions in life because you have rationalized that you will never be successful in it…you’re only killing yourself. It’s no secret why celebrities and other rich and/or famous people seem happier than the rest of the world…it’s because most of them have found a way to do exactly what they want to do with their lives. We are routinely told that money isn’t everything, this is true. However, there is an innately joyful experience to get paid for doing things you actually enjoy doing.

In Conclusion…

It may sound cliché but follow you heart! The mind is there to help you navigate around hurdles and pitfalls, not to prevent you from succeeding in life. Sometimes it’s good to quiet your brain and let the lub-dub of your heart take center stage.

Venus L

Top 5 Places You Should Never Listen to Kerboo

Top 5 Places You Should Never Listen to Kerboo

5. Church—Perhaps you could sneak in a few of his tracks at a secular wedding ceremony or something…but for the most part, Kerboo’s super steamy lover’s music is probably better left out of God’s pews. I mean, I’m not exactly sure what happens when a bunch of devoutly religious people simultaneously “get in the mood,” but suffice to say, I don’t really want to find out. Not sexy!

4. Around Platonic Friends—OK, this is kind of a no-brainer, for those of us who actually have them. In case this isn’t you, Kerboo’s grown and sexy music is intended to set a mood for lovers. If you’re not trying to set a mood, it would behoove you to play something else as you will only be sending mixed signals to the mixed-up individual who is futilely trying to woo you. “Gosh, maybe he is interested after all. We’ve been listening to Kerboo for hours…”

3. During a Break-up—To piggy back off number 4, playing Kerboo during a break-up is the ultimate mark of mixed-messaging. You are likely to confuse or even anger a soon to be ex by playing such beautiful music whilst giving them their walking papers. They may be expecting you to make it official while you’re just trying to make it officially over. Turn off the radio and play it when they leave…but if they’re within earshot, please for the love of God, make sure it’s not “South Side Flair!”

2. Office Parties—You don’t love your coworkers, you likely don’t even like them. So, you don’t want to listen to such potent love music around them. I mean, some tracks are cool for a midday playlist. However, on Friday at your local watering hole, that little cutie who has been giving you the eye may just decide the time is now and make his or her move if certain tracks are playing. You of course will also be powerless to this audio love potion…which could ultimately leave one of you on maternity leave nine months later. Please consider your futures!

1. “Gangsta” Parties—Look, gangsters don’t like love, and they’re not about to start today. Sure, most have a softer side that the rest of the world may never get to see, but that is the point…we’re not supposed to see their softer sides. Don’t go bursting into house parties trying to rep with #KlubKerboo merch. We do not yet have a deployable militia, and will not at all be held accountable for any subsequently arising issues.
Overall, there is honestly never a bad time to listen to Kerboo. On the other hand, it is not always the best time to recruit those around you into #KlubKerboo. Trust me, there will be plenty of time for that…

Venus L

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