Top 5 Places You Should Never Listen to Kerboo

Top 5 Places You Should Never Listen to Kerboo

5. Church—Perhaps you could sneak in a few of his tracks at a secular wedding ceremony or something…but for the most part, Kerboo’s super steamy lover’s music is probably better left out of God’s pews. I mean, I’m not exactly sure what happens when a bunch of devoutly religious people simultaneously “get in the mood,” but suffice to say, I don’t really want to find out. Not sexy!

4. Around Platonic Friends—OK, this is kind of a no-brainer, for those of us who actually have them. In case this isn’t you, Kerboo’s grown and sexy music is intended to set a mood for lovers. If you’re not trying to set a mood, it would behoove you to play something else as you will only be sending mixed signals to the mixed-up individual who is futilely trying to woo you. “Gosh, maybe he is interested after all. We’ve been listening to Kerboo for hours…”

3. During a Break-up—To piggy back off number 4, playing Kerboo during a break-up is the ultimate mark of mixed-messaging. You are likely to confuse or even anger a soon to be ex by playing such beautiful music whilst giving them their walking papers. They may be expecting you to make it official while you’re just trying to make it officially over. Turn off the radio and play it when they leave…but if they’re within earshot, please for the love of God, make sure it’s not “South Side Flair!”

2. Office Parties—You don’t love your coworkers, you likely don’t even like them. So, you don’t want to listen to such potent love music around them. I mean, some tracks are cool for a midday playlist. However, on Friday at your local watering hole, that little cutie who has been giving you the eye may just decide the time is now and make his or her move if certain tracks are playing. You of course will also be powerless to this audio love potion…which could ultimately leave one of you on maternity leave nine months later. Please consider your futures!

1. “Gangsta” Parties—Look, gangsters don’t like love, and they’re not about to start today. Sure, most have a softer side that the rest of the world may never get to see, but that is the point…we’re not supposed to see their softer sides. Don’t go bursting into house parties trying to rep with #KlubKerboo merch. We do not yet have a deployable militia, and will not at all be held accountable for any subsequently arising issues.
Overall, there is honestly never a bad time to listen to Kerboo. On the other hand, it is not always the best time to recruit those around you into #KlubKerboo. Trust me, there will be plenty of time for that…

Venus L

“Improve Your Mood”

Feeling sad? Depressed? Is life getting you down? Not anymore! Tune into one of Ty Showers’ latest and greatest tracks, ‘Improve Your Mood’, and do just that! An uplifting dance, soul, house, and r&b fusion, ‘Improve Your Mood’ is definitely a track for with a little something for everyone. Simultaneously calming and uplifting, Showers once again manages to effortlessly blur the lines between virtually opposite genres of music. A celebratory-sounding house music bass line, blended beautifully with a soulful, r&b melody makes this piece one that seems to both caress and crash though your speakers.

Lyrically speaking, this track keeps it simple while synchronously relaying a deep and complex message. Seemingly written in the voice of a seasoned and soothing guru, Showers dishes out poetic, timeless advice, that is sure to help even the most upset listener locate their inner groove. The track commences with Showers proverbially coaxing listeners into submitting to the groove of the track. Once he has your attention he begins drop jewel after jewel of move-improving goodness; asserting that even the loneliest of us have a reason to groove as well as the fact that loving oneself is the key to true friendship. These points are driven home with repetition of the phrase, ‘Listen to the facts’, as it offers reassurance that the speaker on this track has tried and tested these lessons before releasing them, in all their catchy potency, to the general public. So…listen to the facts, this track will improve your mood… if you choose or… double your sadness back.

Venus L

Do Tell by Calima Shatiday

There’s a calm, hands-on energy in this track from Calima Shatiday’s 2009 release, Poolside II. It’s the kind of music that, yes, would work for the pool—a sunny day, a light breeze, a frosty drink in hand—but this one veers toward another kind of territory: the meditative space.

I’m not saying that your masseuse will be playing Do Tell amid the fragrant oils while leaning into that one spot by your shoulder blade where you always seem to carry some tension—although, should that happen, this music could help. The raspy, white-noisy electronic percussion and a couple of attention-grabbing synth breaks take it out of the “space music” category and off the massage therapy playlist. The music is more likely to leak in from the studio next door, where some centered somebody is painting or developing photos, or maybe even writing. I’m typing in time to it right now.

Part of what gives the tune that centered quality is the play of opposites between its slow-motion EDM groove (about 96 bpm) and the lead melody, which is less a melodic statement than a rhythmic game of catch, tossing notes here and there in triplets and other just-off-the-beat figures, an impressionist syncopation in a kalimba-like timbre. Somewhere in the middle, a jazz organ pulls out a stop or two. What feels meditative about all this is the lack of drama. The music stays true to its good, simple intentions.

Back to that “slow-motion EDM” reference: a listener can easily imagine (or perform) languid, frame-by-frame dance moves to this song. What Shatiday pulls off here is a transparency that lets you in. You can almost see through the music to the story the composer was telling himself as he created it.

That’s quite a feat of artistry.

Jim Howard

Bread and Circuses- Music as a Reflection of the Times

Bread and Circuses: Music as a Reflection of the Times

Music is definitely a reflection of the time in which it is produced. I will examine and primarily focus on America’s most influential genres; Blues, Jazz, R&B, Rock, and Hip-Hop. Blues is a direct descendant of old work songs that slaves often sung in the cotton and sugar cane fields, has influenced just about every genre of modern music, from the somber and sometimes grim lyrics filled with self-pity, or the actual musical structure of the Blues. Looking back, the lyrics of these songs often were about being cheated on, missing home, being penniless, or generally feeling worthless and low. Their songs attempted to identify with other people who may listen and find themselves in similar circumstances. Time progressed and Jazz started as New Orleans street music, which quickly gained in popularity across the country.

When Jazz became more than street music and attracted reputable and renown performers, the identity of these performers became not unlike the mythical lone cowboy, reveling in his uniqueness and self-reliance, his utter coolness standing above everyone else. Along comes R&B and this cult of personality we saw in the Jazz era is still applied heavily to individual performers, but the formula and content of the songs are almost identical to Blues. Rock hits America like a sack of delightful bricks in the late 50’s, and a mythical individual archetype really takes off and influences all these genres.

Rock and Roll artists dressed to impress, had impeccable hair, and all the ladies wanted to be with them. Songs became more about the artists’ overwhelming awesomeness, and how great they were at playing their instruments, or singing their songs. Fast forward to the late 70’s and 80’s, and you’ll find the foundations of Hip-Hop are all about wearing the right clothing, accessories, jewelry, and bragging about one’s capabilities, possessions and most important, money.

Today, you’ll notice people seem to be much more interested in the wacky hijinks of Pop stars instead of their ability to sing, dance, or whatever their talent requires them to do. The appearance and behavior of these Pop stars on stage and in the newspapers is now what is of most importance to push sales. The content of the songs is often braggadocios and aims to establish the artist as a lone rebel amongst a sea of conformists.

My perspective, this period of music we have been trapped in for over a decade is the worst this country has ever endured. I’m not sure if we can pull ourselves out of this funk, but I have a feeling that the poor quality of the music is inextricably tied to the horrible economy. In the 70’s, when the economy wasn’t doing so great, Disco was quite popular and was viewed with the same scorn as Pop is today.

Alas, maybe there is still hope for the future of music.

Bradford Nims

Albums to Watch: ‘0.1’ by Ty Showers

Get a step ahead of the trendiness of popular music and tune in to Showers’ newest releases! This time, Showers is releasing a yet unknown amount of compilations, grouped together by commonalities, and numerically named based on a successional sequence, as well as his other mysterious, personal algorithms. Obviously the first installment of this selection, ‘0.1’ is a 13-track party that packs a serious punch! Categorized as r&b, hip-hop, soul, and love music, these tracks are an candidly apt introduction to Showers as an artist.

The album covers an array of sounds, emotions, and frequencies, beginning with his proverbial calling card, the melodiously catchy, ‘78392’. It also includes fan favorites such as hip-hopish ‘This Has To Be A Dream’, soothingly smooth ‘Living Like The One Percent’ (featuring Shopen Patel), the exceedingly groovy track ‘Love Is Gone’, and the awesomely rhythmic ‘I Like To Party’. As per usual, this album includes a diverse usage of instrumentation; everything electric guitars, to keyboards, to unconventional percussions, there is truly a sound for everyone.

This is the perfect soundtrack for virtually anything. Songs about love, songs about hate, songs about partying, songs about struggles, songs about overcoming…it’s all here! If you’re looking for a new way to get your groove on, listen to ‘0.1’!

Venus L

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