Love or Lust: The Irrefutable Difference
It’s no secret, we live in an over-sexualized society. Gone are the days in which modesty and mystique are considered commodities, and instead we’ve virtually replaced every conceivable trace of these traits with exhibitionism and the boldness of conceit. Is there any room left for true love?!
Of course, there’s still room for love! Though true stories of its existence are more scarce than virgins these days, it still lives, I assure you! On the flip side, in a world in which everyone seems to have a secret agenda, how do you know when you’ve finally found the real thing? It’s really quite simple…
Time and Attention!
You’ve heard the stories many times before: “happily” married couple barely spends time together on their anniversary. The kids are fed, the house is huge and spotless…but where is the love?! Love is disguised as time! Think about it…time is the only thing you can’t get back! We have a whole generation who are fixated on this notion for this very reason. We often pay much more for things if they save us even the tiniest bit of time. It can’t be faked or changed, time just is! It’s no wonder that many couples come together or fall apart depending on the amount of time they spend with one another.
We live in a culture that takes pride in being too busy for most everything. “No time to sit and eat, there’s a game on!” or “No time to help others, I need help myself!” You have likely thought or said similar statements many times. Yet, does this mean there’s no time to love?! Absolutely not! This merely means that unless you love, there is no time…for anyone. I mean, there’s always something to do…even if it’s seemingly nothing to others.
So…the Difference is…??
Lust is superficial; which can be driven by aesthetics, financial/social status, or even as a means to boost one’s own esteem. It can last days, weeks, or years…but never make the mistake of believing that lust automatically turns into love after a certain amount of time. On the flip side, love is driven by your heart that is, the need to love, be loved, understood, empathized with, etc. When someone really loves you, they will always make time for you.
Sure, people get busy…but if Jay-Z and Beyonce can find time to spend with one another, please know that Joe Schmo, who works at the deli, can find time as well. Not to be seen with you, or to spend your money, or explore your body…but because they want to be with you! When you’re in love, you can sit in the park, hospital, living room…wherever, and you’ll always be happy! Not checking your watch or messages every two minutes (unless of course you’re a doctor), simply being present in the moment. Hanging on to this person’s every word and gesture because at that moment nothing else matters…
The Bottom Line
There are no hard and fast rules in relationships these days. Indeed, most are fictitious connections that are over before beginning. People make time for whatever they wish; time for sex, money, and other things that benefit them. However, will they listen to your troubles, help with your dreams, and assist you in planning for the future?? If not…they are likely only planning to be around until the present (namely, you!) no longer suits them.