Slobby Slobberson


I have always been a big time slob. Living my entire adult life alone makes it, not too much of a problem. I can clean when I need to but if I don’t need to i.e.; not having company, I don’t. My clothes get left in the exact spot I took them off. DVDs are strewn about like my place was robbed. The only thing I care about is not having garbage around, and if that’s done, I’m cool. I don’t have a hook or bowl for my keys so they could be anywhere. I’ve almost been late to work trying to find my wallet. I look for things like a cop with a search warrant. They don’t care about putting things back either.

As a kid growing up in Detroit, I had major problems cleaning my room. I had to be threatened with getting left behind on a trip to Edgewater Park. My definition of cleaning was jamming everything either under the bed or in the closet. If my parents inspection involved anything more than sticking their head in the door, I was busted.

Nowadays when I walk in and break something with my first step, I know it’s time to clean up. A couple of years ago I came up with a method of cleaning that gets me through. After putting a play list of “cleaning” music together, I take several pictures of the mess from different angles. As I slowly get the room in shape, I stop and take more pictures. When finished, I upload the pics to my computer. My hope is one day while looking at the pictures I will realize how easy it is not to let the room get messy. How is that working out? Not too well, my computer is filled with pictures of my room in various stages of disarray.

William Stephenson

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